we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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