Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize
