Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize
