my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
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