I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
Randomize
