Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
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