Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
Randomize
