it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
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