found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
mustard is like jesus in yellow tights
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
Randomize
