I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Randomize
