OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize
