God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
Who wears a wallet chain?!
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Randomize
