The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
They should really pass out barf bags in church
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
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