i just wanna soil my oats bro
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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