Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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