Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
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