Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
You took a bar mat shot.
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
Randomize
