So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Randomize
