3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
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