Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Randomize
