I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
That fat broad you banged out last night is still here and I can hear her snoring through the living room wall. I would leave, but I don't want to come home to an empty fridge.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
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