so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
Randomize
