There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
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