Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
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