I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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