She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
So i've noticed that drunk me erases sent messages to hide them from sober me, because drunk me knows that sober me will be PISSED at drunk me.
Randomize
