Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Randomize
