Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
Help me help you realize you are a moron
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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