they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
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