I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
I can't turn off my feet"
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
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