i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
she looked like the before picture.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
