Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
I'm not going to waste the next hour of my life writing a diplomatic email explaining that she's bitch. I have Parks and Rec to watch.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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