So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
