I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Randomize
