He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Randomize
