Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
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Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
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You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
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