I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
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