He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
