I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
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