This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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