Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Randomize
