is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Randomize
