Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
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I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
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