I think scott just propositioned me for sex
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
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