just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
Randomize
