Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
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