i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
