So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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