Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
