I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
No more Irish car bombs ever.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Randomize