Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
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